Glossary of Idiosyncratic Vernacular

A fuller glossary can be found here.


ad himinem – Closely related to ad hominem, literal Latin “to the man”, this is instead “to the male” and removes gender ambiguity. It is however equally applicable to females who inexplicably defend argument as though cum testiculis, or seek to defend indefensible and erroneous  male perspectives. See here.

baboon board – see Pharyngula.

Baboon King – see Naked Emperor, The

baboons – general denizens of the baboon board, freefromthoughtblogs, skepchick and related sites who specialise in confirmation bias, cognitive dissonance, strategic misuse of information and organising lynch mobs.

cesspit of lies – Wikipedia. The sheer number of cretins that vilify Wikipedia without substantiating their whining no longer even merit any kind of serious response. Amongst acquaintances, we just chuckle and use this alternative term instead. Wikipedia, you rock, I love you – warts and all.

clique de babouins – See Pharyngula. Somehow, saying it in French makes it sound less nauseating. (Thanks MCH)

cunt kick – aka Ophelia’s Calvary. A perfect example of Myer’s Law. See here.

gender feminism – see slave morality.

GollumPhil Plait. Coined by a character called CK, so ask him. I like it. “We mussst be nice, preciousss, yesss nice. Not assholesss, oh noes… must never be assholesss my preciousss, we are nice, yesssss…”

Merkin – not a pubic wig. American.

Myers’ Law – In its simplest form the law states a baboon has no capacity to either receive or transmit information without corrupting that information. In practical terms this equates to there being no realistic relation between what you communicate to a baboon and what that baboon actually hears. This communication loses even more of its original meaning in the event that baboon then communicates a response back to you. Further, when information enters the baboon echo chamber it loses all relation to reality altogether in a very short time via baboon to baboon retransmission. See cunt kick.

Naked Emperor, ThePZ Myers. Famous for coining the Courtier’s Reply. As of late, spending his days being a living, breathing example of it.

new, new atheism – the toxic brand of intolerant and divisive neo-puritan, quasi-Calvinist ideological atheism being peddled by the baboons with openly fascist tactics. The policy is one of “assimilate or destroy” – there is no negotiation.

Ophelia’s Calvary – see cunt kick. A perfect example of exactly how far baboons are prepared to deform reality in the pursuit of personal suffering.

PharyngulaYellow journalism comes to science and skepticism. Could readily be dismissed as a Poe liberal version of Faux News were it not for the sheer effort put into personal attacks against individuals that deviate from standard operating groupthink.

quantum sardonics – also known as coincidence, serendipity, synchronicity and WTF? For crazy people that have no grip on reality it is known as apophenia and pareidolia. It is where the universe conspires to make unrelated data collide with very unusual timing, and has a long history of giving people strange new perspectives on things. This is an example.

reductio ad Watsonum – closely related to ad hominem, ad himinem, reductio ad Hitlerum and reductio ad absurdum. This is a fallacy of irrelevance where the suggested logic is one of guilt by association – that only rapists are capable of thinking in a manner such as that of the target of the fallacy, therefore the target must be a rapist or a rape apologist. See here.

slave morality – see gender feminism.

South Park lesbian – a gender feminist who squeals like a stuck pig about demeaning and insulting stereotypes whilst simultaneously confirming each and every one of them, and doing so to such excess she becomes impossible to parody. Reserves extra special venom for gender traitors. Can also be male.

toilet slaves – male feminists that insist on informing you they are male feminists at the very first opportunity, regardless of what the topic is.

typhos – Archaic Greek, literally “smoke, vapor”. A cloudy, misty, befuddled state of mind; intellectual smog; the delerium of popular ideas and conventions that are thoroughly divorced from reality or merit.

The Cynics persisted in the conviction that most people live as if immersed in a cloud of smoke (typhos) that prevents them from seeing clearly and does not allow them to use that which distinguishes humans from animals—namely, the capacity to reason. In abandoning this capacity, people forsake their true nature. Diogenes often said that the human world is an enormous madhouse in which every sort of madness is found everywhere: cruelty, greed, deception, mendacity, brutality, uncontrolled hedonism, and the rest of the all-too-common diseases that afflict humanity and have become endemic in the form of things such as religion, patriotism, tradition, and other manifestations of irrationality. — Luis Navia: Cynicism – Bibliography

Watson’s law – Corollary to Godwin’s law. “As an online discussion involving Skepchicks and males (or phallophilic females) grows longer, the probability of conclusive, irreproachable evidence involving sexism or misogyny being introduced approaches 1 (100%).” See here.

17 Responses to “Glossary”

  1. spectator Says:

    Can anyone tell me what “OM” means? It’s not on their “wiki”. I suspect it’s a trap set out for the poor naive outsiders to fall into.

    1. franc hoggle Says:

      Their “wiki” is reserved for personal vilification of those that laugh at The Naked Emperor. OM => original matter?

    2. Darren Says:

      On the baboon board, “OM” refers to the “Order of Molly”. It’s a monthly award given to the poster who has acceded to the hive-mind using the most words.

      1. franc hoggle Says:

        Makes sense. “Quantity” being preferable over “quality”.

  2. Pike Rust (I'm a toilet slave) Says:

    Sad, sad, sad,

    What a heap of mouse droppings.

  3. Collin Says:

    “Quantum sardonics”? This is the religious concept better known as “imminent justice” or “instant karma”. I thought you’re an atheist?

    1. franc hoggle Says:

      I’m an apatheist, a cosmopolite and a Cynic. I am also resigned to an endless stream of the humour impaired.

      1. Collin Says:

        Sorry. It’s my autism.

      2. franc hoggle Says:

        OK, sorry. But I guess it’s fair to warn you to look beneath the obvious for much of what is here.

    1. Alessandro Says:

      fuck it. I’m just going to let The following rneect comments on the “Pharyngula” blog have been brought to my attention via multple emails from readers–some of them victims of rape and sexual abuse:Fuck them [my co-blogger, our commenters, and I] all sideways with a rusty fucking knife.Later:The commenters are basically wetting themselves hoping Kirshenbaum comes down hard because people are saying she should be raped with a rusty knife, and Myers “likes it that way”.I am a big proponent of free speech, however, this thread crosses the line by advocating sexual and physical violence. I have become accustomed to ignoring much of the ridicule I receive online, but keeping silent on this particular issue, is, in my mind, acceptance. Those who contacted me do not have a platform to publicly express their disgust, but I can. Rape is not a joke or game and the fact that these remarks were not removed perpetuates the notion that they’re okay.I seem to remember there being quite a kerfuffle over that post. Something about tone trolls ? People (deliberately?) taking words too literally?Jesus fuck, get a grip.

  4. […] was a matter of time and not entirely unexpected. The baboon board lynch mob has finally arrived and are baying for blood. There were a couple of dozen in the queue […]

    1. Fabiana Says:

      Once again, you people coaftnle the issue. We saw the same thing when you were hollering Watson wasn’t actually raped, so what the hell is her problem?’The problem is not that the statement was actually likely to lead to violence against the genitals in question. The problem is that the statement promotes violence against women in general. Someone out there somewhere is reading that statement and saying Yeah, fuck those bitches!’ and is going to feel justified later tonight when he feels like he needs to punch his girlfriend for getting mouthy. Someone out there is going to feel justified in raping some woman because those cunts deserve to be kicked in the cunt.’ This is the behavior that you promote when you make these sorts of statements. Is there a direct line of cause and effect? Probably not. It’s cumulative, over the course of weeks or months or years but it’s a cumulative effect that YOU are supporting and promoting when you make and support these comments. And it’s a cumulative effect that you have to remain carefully ignorant of to think it’s okay to continue spewing those noxious emissions on ERV’s little monument’.Do you actually think that there aren’t actual rapists in the ranks of the MRA’s that are cheering this ridiculous feud on? Are you really more comfortable on their side than on the side of the people calling for this crap to end?

  5. Maria Says:

    So, John, if I haven’t been kicked in the teeth like you were then the word fag doesn’t hurt ppleoe? People were saying I had pulled a non-sequitur, but it looks like you are the real non-sequitur holder. And I know atheists often get accused of being emotionless like Vulcans, but you really exemplify it with crap like this: People will call you names. Unless you believe them, unless you choose to give them power, they have nothing over you. Oh yeah, language is completely dependent upon how you, John C. Welch, want it to be. Take it like a (str8) man, faggot! And let’s wipe away what the word fag means today and how it is used today to hurt men and how it has been used that way in the past with a magic handwave from John C. Welch and pretend that suppressing its usage won’t make things better. No, nobody should stand up and call out the bullies using the word fag to verbally assault ppleoe because that won’t do a lick of good.

  6. […] Law – In its simplest form Myers’ Law states a baboon has no capacity to either receive or transmit information without corrupting that […]

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