rape : …the crime, typically committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him without their consent and against their will, especially by the threat or use of violence against them…
I’m not sure why I decided to be masochistic and read the comments this morning, I could not look away, it took energy to finally close the window. The final straw for me was this one, it makes me profoundly ashamed to be the same sex as the one who wrote it:
“Somehow it never occurs to people that if men choose to pursue sex with inebriated women, they are asking for it… where “it” is being accused of rape, of course.
“What I was attempting to get across with the comment went completely over their heads. whooooosh! Not one person understood.”
They sure didn’t. I was going to make post fro the Wiki of the series of the replies to you ranging from non sequitor to vicious, but just got disheartened with the stupidity of it all, and the unbelievably narrow black and white world those folks live in; totally nuance-, context-, and variable-free.
Aslo, I did not know you were Sophia. Good to know.
Stephanie must have been jealous that the attention got focused on PZ’s threat of doc dropping private info yesterday. She now wants to doc drop Franc and is trying to come up with a good reason to do it. Pathetic.
How many adult guys do you think would actually admit to getting raped (in a bad way)?
Unless totally unconcious or held at gunpoint, in general, I’m not sure of a way a guy _can_ be raped by a woman. Anyone here have any examples on how it would be possible? i can’t think of any myself… And I’m a guy.
I have a friend who does not drink alcohol, years ago a woman put some drug in his drink, and when he woke up, she was on top of him. He has no memory of anything before that, so he was not completely unconscious, but may as well have been. That is rape.
A woman being tipsy, having sex and regretting it the next day is not rape.
You bring up an important problem with which we as a society need to deal. There is this unfortunate (being generous there) misconception that prevails through our society because of the false and stupid idea that men are always supposed to be ready and willing to have sex. That misconception is a harmful one that has far too powerful a grip over our collective minds and strips men of refuge and support structures if they ever are raped.
It’s because of this attitude that people are stunned to hear about men being raped by women, and why men are reluctant to come forward about it. “They’re supposed to enjoy it right??” What doesn’t help is the idea that men aren’t supposed to “whine” about things; that they should shut up and take it “like men” (never you mind that there is really no clear idea in our society about what masculinity means, we just kind of make it up as we go).
The reality is that there are times at which, and people with whom, men do not want to have sex. They are not machines regardless of the apparent consensus. Men can be raped, and it doesn’t require any sort of extraordinary circumstances for it to happen.
Sorry I was supposed to be more “in your face” wasn’t I? I’ve failed rape victims everywhere and vicariously condoned it! I REPENT! Here goes *ahem*… [Baboon Mode ON] U RAPE APOLOGIST SLIME FUCK U WITH A RUSTY KNIFE WIELDED BY A PORCUPINE!!!! [Baboon Mode OFF]
There is this unfortunate (being generous there) misconception that prevails through our society because of the false and stupid idea that men are always supposed to be ready and willing to have sex. That misconception is a harmful one that has far too powerful a grip over our collective minds and strips men of refuge and support structures if they ever are raped.
That’s one aspect. The other is that men, by virtue of being men, are necessarily physically stronger than women. It’s not always the case. Some women are quite capable of physically overpowering some men.
There’s also the idea that ‘a man never hits a women’. If a man is being sexually assaulted by a woman he may be reluctant to use force to prevent or stop the assault.
And finally, tying into the point you raise, Overloard, erection and ejaculation are not indicators of consent by a man to have sex. They are simply physiological reactions to stimuli. It’s like saying a woman wasn’t raped because she had an orgasm. Not true.
There’s also the idea that ‘a man never hits a women’.
Guess what happens if that’s done in a mostly-traditional society such as India. Here is a reality show gone haywire. The guy gets clobbered after the 2 min mark. Bear with the occasional Hindi (language).
I’m in my early 40’s and I do not want children at all, not even a fleeting thought. I quite honestly can’t wait until I am no longer able to. If I could afford it, I’d have my tubes tied.
It’s amazing how often I’ve been patronised when younger “You’ll change your mind, honey” and even more condescending comments. Up until recently I got a look of confusion, or sympathy (or worse) from many women when I would tell them that I have no interest in having children. Men have never acted that way, My decision has always had respect from them.
Another good platitude is, “B-but it’s different when they’re *your* own kids.” How?? They’re still drool-sodden shit-reeking germ sponges that tie you down, burn through your money, and make your life miserable for 20 years.
What would it take to have 8 kids then? This was on the CBS news yesterday.. The PC journalists never talk about the elephant in the room.. having way more kids than you can handle. Its never the people’s fault. Its always society failing to provide them jobs. Family faces the growing edge of poverty